For babies, sleep is of great importance in terms of both their physical and psychological development. So much so that sleep comes second to nutrition. Parents often worry about how their newborn will sleep. To obtain sound information about neonatal sleep patterns, it is useful to have information about the two basic stages of sleep, documented by studying the activities of the human brain. The first of these is REM (Rapid Eye Movement) sleep. REM sleep, which is made up of the first letters of the words “Rapid Eye Movements”, is the time of dreams. REM sleep is preceded by NREM (Non-Rapid Eye Movement) sleep. No dreams occur during NREM sleep. Studies show that the baby experiences REM sleep from about the seventh month of pregnancy while developing NREM sleep from the eighth month onwards.

NREM sleep has four successive phases.

Phase 1: Corresponds approximately to the first five minutes of sleep. The first phase sees a transition from mild drowsiness to sleep. When the eyelids are closed, the eyes move quickly and brain activity begins to slow down.

Phase 2: Refers to 15 to 45 minute long period of mild sleep.

Phase 3: It is the transition to deep sleep, when the metabolism, heartbeat and breathing slow down, muscles relax and the body cools down with sweating.

Phase 4: Refers to the deepest sleep state. It is hard to wake up someone in the third or fourth phase of sleep.

REM sleep kicks in after Phase 1 and 2 of NREM sleep are completed.

Newborn babies have a slightly different sleep pattern. Initially, a newborn wakes up every 2-3 hours, stays awake for a short while after getting fed, and then falls asleep again. A newborn baby needs about 18 hours of sleep. Babies get REM sleep in the first months, and in the following periods they begin to get NREM sleep. Babies go into REM sleep as soon as they close their eyes until they are three months old. Once the baby is two months old, they will be getting longer hours of night rest accompanied by less sleep during daytime from the third month onwards. During night time, they sleep deeper with fewer instances of waking up in the middle of the night.

Babies take longer to fall into deep sleep, as opposed to adults who can move from light sleep to deep sleep much more quickly. When parents put their babies to bed right after feeding them or rocking them to sleep, or put them to sleep using some other method, their babies often wake up and start crying. It takes approximately 20 minutes for babies to go into deep sleep. Especially in the first few months, it would help to stay by your baby’s side until they fall into deep sleep so that they will have you by their side when they wake up, filling them with a sensation of safety and making them go back to sleep easily. In the following months, however, you can get your baby accustomed to sleeping on their own so that they can transition from light sleep to deep sleep on their own.

How Much Sleep Babies Need and Suggestions:

0-6 weeks: Newborns usually sleep 16 to 18 hours. Some babies wake up frequently, while others sleep up to 4-5 hours. It is useful to start teaching your baby the difference between day and night from the first weeks. The easiest way to achieve this is not to keep your baby away from daytime noises when sleeping, not to make special efforts to be quiet and not to make the environment in which they sleep dark; and provide a quiet and dark environment when your baby sleeps at night.

6-8 weeks: Babies sleep 14 to 15 hours during these weeks. The baby starts distinguishing between daytime and nighttime, and as intervals between feeding times get longer, babies sleep longer at night time. The second month is important for the baby to get used to everyday family life. Now you can wake up your baby and feed them one last time before you go to bed, and wake them up in the morning at a time you think is right. Your baby’s periods of restlessness and crying are also more regular now (unless your baby has colic); their restlessness usually occurs at the end of the day and ends with pooping. Your baby is ready to suckle and sleep.

After 16 weeks: During this time, your baby is expected to sleep through 7-8 hours a night without interruption. The meaning of “uninterrupted sleep” for the baby is when they transition from deep sleep to light/superficial sleep without waking up. A baby should sleep 14 hours during the day. The baby transitioning to light sleep, cries makes noises, turns over in bed, but it should be remembered that the baby is still asleep during all this, and they should learn to fall into deep sleep by calming/relaxing themselves during these transitional stages of sleep.

After 20 weeks: From this time onwards, babies should have at least two daytime naps, one before noon and one after noon, in addition to uninterrupted nighttime sleep. Even if they do not sleep, they should at least spend these hours alone in bed. They are expected to sleep 13 to 14 hours.

24-48 weeks: A baby who sleeps 3-4 hours during the day is expected to sleep for an uninterrupted 11 hours at night. But most parents are not so lucky. This is because during these months, babies want to continue practicing their newly learnt daytime skills such as turning, climbing and crawling when they go to bed at night causing them not to fall asleep.

It is common for babies to push away strangers and even familiar faces such as their caregivers or aunts and uncles, especially between 24-48 weeks. The baby might also feel uncomfortable in unfamiliar places and cleave more onto their mother. This emotional response is called abandonment anxiety.

During this stage, which is important for your baby’s emotional and spiritual development, the baby begins to understand that they are an individual with reference to other people around them, thus experiencing the fear of being separated from their parents. It is quite normal for babies to experience various sleep problems during this period. If babies wake up to find themselves in a dark room, they may think they have been abandoned by their parents and start crying. Parents should be extra careful during this critical time, and take special care to be there for their babies when they need it.

Babies Learning to Sleep

Babies learning to sleep regularly depends largely on their parents. Undoubtedly, every baby needs their parents, but parents often make a mistake in this regard. Running to their room as soon as you hear your baby cry and holding them, talking to them or showing them affection might distract the baby to the point where they might struggle to fall asleep on their own and go into deep sleep. Due to this wrong approach, the baby, going into a light sleep every 2-3 hours, wakes up every time to get fed and after a while gets used to this routine. And as the baby gets too used to the routine, it will be harder going forward to change it.

It is very important to get babies accustomed to sleeping alone from the first months without parents changing their minds along the way. However, this does not mean that you should never get the baby into your bed and spend quality time with them. The important point is that your baby understands that they have their own bed and realizes that sleeping with you is just for pleasure, not part of a routine. Parents usually want their children to sleep next to them for reasons ranging from “I don’t want them to get cold in winter, they tend to throw away their blanket during sleep” to “they are afraid of sleeping alone at night”, but this kind of behavior usually continues way beyond that point. Parents’ desire to sleep next to their babies is understandable to some extent, but that is so unhealthy for their babies’ psychological development. The main disadvantage of this situation is that children become dependent on their parents and perceive sleeping alone as being pushed away by their elders.

For babies to sleep in their own beds, first they must be put to bed at a certain time. The most important step in getting your baby to sleep well at night is to create a regular bedtime routine. If they follow the same routine every night, they will quickly realize that nighttime is not for playing games, but going to bed. You can help your baby get into the bedtime routine with a warm, soothing bath at the same time every day followed by reading a fairy tale, breastfeeding and going to bed. The important thing is to help your baby relax. Therefore, it is useful to avoid stimulating activities. Telling or reading a story or singing or playing lullabies until they fall asleep, and leaving the room once they have slept will help them get into the habit of sleeping alone.

You can also try putting your baby to sleep with a special quilt, a thin cotton blanket, or a plush toy that meets all the necessary safety standards – but make sure the toy doesn’t cover the baby’s face to pose a choking hazard. If they know that their favorite teddy bear is waiting for them in bed every night, they will make a mental connection between the toy and sleeping. If they ever wake up during sleep, they will go back to sleep again in the comfort of the teddy bear. Hug the teddy bear so that your scent rubs off on it. So your baby will feel that a part of you is with them throughout the night.

Another method, designed to teach the baby to sleep alone within a week by allowing them to cry regularly, involves putting the baby to bed and leaving them to sleep alone each night after regularly following the same routines. With this method, no matter how much the baby cries, like 10 minutes on the first day, 15 minutes on the second day and 20 minutes on the third day, they should learn to sleep alone without intervention. It is often the case that babies learn to fall asleep on their own within a week without crying. However, with this technique, it is not very clear if the baby learns to fall asleep without crying or the baby simply learns that the parents are not coming no matter how much they cry. It should also be taken into account that using this method can cause various problems in the future, considering that babies need to feel “safe”, especially in the first stages of life.

The first few months of your baby are a learning curve, laying the groundwork for future habits they may get to acquire as they age. For this reason, it is best to handle this sensitive period in light of information gained through scientific research and maternal instincts.